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Question:  I have been dating a Christian man for the past 18 months who was previously married. We love each other but he is having a hard time committing to marriage. I am beginning to feel that there is something wrong with me. Can you help me understand why he is struggling to commit to marriage?

Answer:  Often, people who have suffered through a failed marriage and divorce have trouble recommitting themselves to marriage. The unwillingness to commit is often connected to the emotional and psychological injuries they sustained during and after their failed marriage. In these cases, such persons have more than likely not permitted themselves to process through the toxic feelings and thoughts connected to their failed marriage.

If the information above resonates with you, it may be that his reluctance to commit to remarriage has more to do with what's going on with him and very little to do with you. Consulting with a competent, caring therapist who understands the psychodynamics of what I've alluded to can help him find peace and perspective and help you both decide if you should reconcile.